1. Barns MAKES THE RULES !
2. You don't have to be kind, considerate or politically correct. Barns certainly wont be! But: don't be stupid, oblique, sophomoric, don't obfuscate and don't be gratuitous about anything (except hyper successful yet tortured souls)..
3. If you have to look up any of the words in rule #2, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO GET ALONG WITH YOUR FELLOW CROAKERS AND WITH ME!
4. PROFANITY is the effort of a feeble mind to express itself forcefully. Thus, it is reserved for me! If YOU are profane, YOU WILL BE DUMPED!
5. Be smart and creative. Not just clever!
6. If you have a vendetta, take it someplace else. Hire a lawyer!
7. You have to be brief and to the point!  If you want to, you CAN post the MAGNA CARTA or the complete works of Somerset Maugham with links to wherever if you want to – assuming you can afford to do that! We will charge you!
8. Tell us who you are! Give us somebody else's name or information or Mickey Mouse stuff?  Bad karma! Better read up on the bible, torah, kur'an, kojiki, Suramgamasamadhisutra, Confucious or Mao's little red book. Your croakes™ will be as anonymous as you choose (under some no doubt clever “username” you pick).
9. Have to give us your email address.  We will talk to you by email... if your are worth our while! Give us a Mickey Mouse email address and we will set your sorry behind afloat forever.  And tell your closest 1.2 million friends that you are spineless.
10. TELL US WHAT YOU REALLY THINK AND FEEL! PICK A FIGHT WITH Barns OR ANY OTHER CROAKER™! POST YOUR ERUDITE STUFF ON TOP OF ANY OTHER POST YOU LOVE OR LOVE TO HATE OR YOU JUST WANT TO MESS WITH!

    WE ARE EQUAL OPPORTUNITY CYNICS HERE!!

11. See rule #1?  Don’t like it?  You’ll get all of Barns' size 13 attitude up YOUR attitude.

I read 'em!

Em Smash

Located in Sherman Oaks, California 91423 United States

Really 25 years old

Tell people I'm 25 years old

Can pass for 21 years old

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